Sunday, June 27, 2010

What sucks more than suck?

Besides the Cubs I mean. I've been trying to think of a word to accurately describe this team. "Sucks" just doesn't do it justice. Actually, if this team sucked, it'd be an improvement over what they're doing now.

"Bad" doesn't seem to fit the bill. There are many levels of bad, and this team passed through all of them on their elevator to the basement.

"Shit" or "shitty" would work, but as a rule, I generally try to avoid cursing in the written word. Spoken, I would make a drunken sailor blush, but there's a permanence about writing that I'm not comfortable expressing myself in that way. Besides, this team is too bad to qualify for shitty anyway.

"Blah" describes a lot of their play. Lollygaging, to use a Bull Durham term. That's just one dimension of how bad they are though. So that brings us to the current description of choice -

Pitiful. They're just so bad, so blah, so sucky and so shitty, that it's pathetic. THey are a pathetic excuse for a baseball team, and that's about it. I pity them. I pity the fact that an entire city is finally catching up with the rest of the nation and actually hating them. You suck so bad, you transcend words. You're just pitiful. Now get out there and win, you ridiculous, pitiful, fucktards.

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