New Rules and Regs for Singing the Stretch

So, "McLovin" sang the Stretch today. I say "McLovin" because that is how Pat Hughes introduced him. Mc - Freakin' - Lovin. Really?

I'm not ashamed I had to google it. And don't get me wrong, I found a funny, if R-Rated clip below, but...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9RWVEAQeC0

Ricketts, haven't we already had this conversation? Here are the new rules that need to be implemented to the "Guest Conductors" for Take Me Out To The Ballgame. There are only two of them, so you don't even need to pay attention for very long.

1. Must have some Chicago connection. Passing through or assaulting a Walgreens employee does not qualify. You must've been born here, own real estate here, or have started a professional theatre here. This is a baseball game. Not a late-night talk show. You want to promote something, talk to Letterman.

2. If you do not root, root, root for the Cubbies, sit the f*ck down. I'm tired of the Bob Uekers, the Bernie Macs, the baseball legends who change the lyrics, pull the mic away, or otherwise don't say the name. If you're not willing to don a Cubs hat and Jersey in front of millions of TV viewers and profess your love for our team, sit the f*ck down, and yes, I'm talking to you Mr. President.

So there are your rules. If you fail to meet both, go home and make a donation to Haiti to get your mug on TV. Leave our game and our song alone.